Can Christmas just get here so it can finally just be over?
I am so sick of Christmas already! Enough! Let's just have the day and get it over with. Traffic is horrible, crowds are unruly, people are rude and as far as getting anything productive done -- yeah, give it up until January 2. More realistically, life won't be normal again until January 8. I'm not good at chilling out; I'm an ideas person and I like to work on those ideas as a writer. But the winter chill is being forced on me nonetheless.
I'm tired of eating too much holiday junkfood and the last thing I want to do is be out and about at a store or in traffic over the weekend. If I could figure out a way to stay in my apartment, I would. But I can't. My better half is trying to get me to go out on New Year's Eve and that's not going to happen either because that's amateur night. Every idiot who can't hold their liquor will on the roads and I'd like to avoid that. Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve is just enough for me. I don't want to drink because I don't want to gain any more weight than I already have.
My favorite jeans don't fit and I'm pissed about that. I'm ready for a detox diet and an hour of working out each day. I'm sick of holiday food already! Not that it isn't tasty, but the size of my ass directly influences the amount of pleasure I get from eating junk. Guess what? I suddenly don't crave chocolate at all. Pass the broccoli, please. That's the Christmas tree I'd like to have right about now.
I ate soup for dinner like a sick person. I made it for the actual sick person in the household, but he's been asleep since I got home from work. I also made him tea, but again, I am the only one reaping the benefits. I have been sucking down Wal-borne for a couple days along with my usual wheat grass/juice concoction. Whatever is going around -- everyone is sick. But I seem to be fighting it off pretty well.
So here is my list of all the things that make the holidays less fun each year. Feel free to add to it:
1. People spend too much money, go into debt, and try to impress people with gifts. It's a financial disaster for the majority of people in this country who are too traditional to rise above it.
2. The Christmas cold. Everyone is suffering from it.
3. Crowds.
4. Rude people in crowds.
5. Traffic.
6. Having to put up with making everyone happy and keeping the peace with family and friends,
7. Not being able to get anything done because everyone in the free world is on vacation! It's like treading water in between Thanksgiving and the first or second week of the new year.
8. All the sweets and the fattening foods you end up eating because they are everywhere you turn.
9. Spending so much time cooking, baking, shopping, wrapping, planning...
Finally, I can't leave my ba humbug rant up here without indulging in something Christmas-themed yet totally non-traditional. This is pretty funny:
I'm tired of eating too much holiday junkfood and the last thing I want to do is be out and about at a store or in traffic over the weekend. If I could figure out a way to stay in my apartment, I would. But I can't. My better half is trying to get me to go out on New Year's Eve and that's not going to happen either because that's amateur night. Every idiot who can't hold their liquor will on the roads and I'd like to avoid that. Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve is just enough for me. I don't want to drink because I don't want to gain any more weight than I already have.
My favorite jeans don't fit and I'm pissed about that. I'm ready for a detox diet and an hour of working out each day. I'm sick of holiday food already! Not that it isn't tasty, but the size of my ass directly influences the amount of pleasure I get from eating junk. Guess what? I suddenly don't crave chocolate at all. Pass the broccoli, please. That's the Christmas tree I'd like to have right about now.
I ate soup for dinner like a sick person. I made it for the actual sick person in the household, but he's been asleep since I got home from work. I also made him tea, but again, I am the only one reaping the benefits. I have been sucking down Wal-borne for a couple days along with my usual wheat grass/juice concoction. Whatever is going around -- everyone is sick. But I seem to be fighting it off pretty well.
So here is my list of all the things that make the holidays less fun each year. Feel free to add to it:
1. People spend too much money, go into debt, and try to impress people with gifts. It's a financial disaster for the majority of people in this country who are too traditional to rise above it.
2. The Christmas cold. Everyone is suffering from it.
3. Crowds.
4. Rude people in crowds.
5. Traffic.
6. Having to put up with making everyone happy and keeping the peace with family and friends,
7. Not being able to get anything done because everyone in the free world is on vacation! It's like treading water in between Thanksgiving and the first or second week of the new year.
8. All the sweets and the fattening foods you end up eating because they are everywhere you turn.
9. Spending so much time cooking, baking, shopping, wrapping, planning...
Finally, I can't leave my ba humbug rant up here without indulging in something Christmas-themed yet totally non-traditional. This is pretty funny:
posted by Heather Larson at 7:39 PM
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